I engage in online discussion because I want to influence debate. It also helps to hone my understanding of an issue if I bounce my ideas into the room. I don't remember changing anyone's mind. The people I usually engage with hold entrenched views. I seem to like to take on the most obdurate.
I suppose I am a bit of a masochist. Has your own mind ever been changed? My views on feminism changed as a result of engagement in the IT forum. Generally though, my tone has become more sensitive to those whose opinions are different to mine. Does the existence of the internet mean you argue more than in the past?
I used to take the arguments to heart and get really upset at people. Now I am more sanguine. It is akin to passing by a car crash sometimes. You promise yourself that this time you won't look but you can't help yourself. I do enjoy the writing bit though. It is like a social centre for the mildly deranged I think. People with wildly opposing views who have chummy moments and pet names. It's weird. Please update your payment details to keep enjoying your Irish Times subscription.
Why do we argue online? Why do we do it and does anyone ever win? Fri, Jul 24, , Patrick Freyne. Home energy upgrades are now more important than ever. The Dublin start-up making the future better with an appreciation for innovation. Commenting on The Irish Times has changed. To comment you must now be an Irish Times subscriber.
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We ask that you report content that you in good faith believe violates the above rules by clicking the Flag link next to the offending comment or by filling out this form. New comments are only accepted for 3 days from the date of publication. Subscriber Only. Once upon a time it was clear — it was the mother.
Or the father, depending on which era you choose. Of course one can try quiet, rational negotiation between two adults leading to a sensible mutual outcome. Or one can ask a magic fairy to intervene. Either are equally likely. Interior design. Who earns most? If you earn five times what your partner does, should you split it evenly with them?
Answers on a postcard …. Perhaps you like her sister a little too much. Also, the way your parents relate will have provided you with a template, consciously or unconsciously, for the way you relate. If you are in a melded family, take all these difficulties and multiply them by They — like Christmas and birthdays — are petri dishes for disappointment, and disappointment leads to conflict. Because you look for someone to blame see No 5.
It's natural for people who live together and spend a lot of time with each other to sometimes disagree and lose their tempers. Just think of the last time you and your brother or sister got into a fight. You didn't really mean all those things you said, did you? In the end, you probably made up. The same goes for parents. If you get really upset when your parents fight, you might want to talk to them about your feelings.
Sometimes, parents don't realize that their arguing makes kids feel upset. If you tell them how you feel, they'll probably try to stop or at least explain to you why they are disagreeing. It's hard to believe it, but your parents were once kids, too. It might seem like they don't understand you — but don't give up. Remember that they don't really want to make things difficult for you.
Your parents care about you, but sometimes it's just hard for them to easily see your point of view. A parent's job is to look out for you and keep you safe — until you're old enough to take care of yourself and some parents have trouble giving up watching out for their kids even then!
Usually, kids who fight with their parents learn to get along with them eventually. This is especially true if kids are able to talk to their parents about how they feel and what's important to them. Keep in mind, though, that this can take time and a lot of patience. It's not always easy.
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